Faith-Seeking-Understanding
Michael Tang
(M.Div)
Seeking Answers in Faith
In my admission interview, I remember President Cho asked me why I would like to study at the seminary and what I expected of the study. The primary reason for my application was, of course, the Lord’s calling upon me. As for my expectations, I was hoping to find answers to a few questions I had in mind through studying at the seminary. A couple of questions, as I vaguely recall, were “What is church? How should a church be?” and “What is fellowship? How should fellowship be?” These questions arose while I was serving the Lord and growing in faith. As young and theologically unequipped as I was, I thought the seminary must be the place that holds the answers to my queries and that I could find them here.
Three years of learning have passed since then and I am graduating. Model answers to my questions were found, of course. Or perhaps, I acquired the methodologies, at least, to find such answers. Were my expectations of studying at the seminary fulfilled or achieved, however? Probably not.
Raising Many More Questions
While some may say that the seminary is a place where answers are found, I would say, otherwise, that studying here has helped us learn how to raise more questions than answers. For example, the answer to my question of “What is church?” could be somewhat like: “It is established by Jesus Christ to bear witness on earth to His Kingdom.” However, elaborating on, we must, at least, keep on asking “Why should the church be His witness?” “What is His Kingdom like?” “How to bear witness?” “What causes the church to fail in bearing witness?” “How does the church bear witness in a society like Hong Kong today?” and so on. The list could go on and on as more questions seem to emerge from every answer.
A Never-Ending Seeking Journey
Initially, I was here to seek answers and solutions to my questions when I first entered the seminary. Now at the end, I am leaving with more questions than ever in my mind. Yet I am neither frustrated nor disappointed. In fact, I am leaving the seminary with much anticipation and excitement, as I realize that the Christian faith is “living”; it allows us to explore, make mistakes, repent and restart in a never-ending journey of inquiring and seeking. The Christian faith does not give us merely “model answers” nor is it a unified religion with a single dimension. It is not even being authoritative and leaving no room for questions and queries. It is more like a process of “faith seeking understanding”: as we first believe, questions can be raised to seek further understanding; as we understand more, our faith is reinforced, and further questions arise; and the entire process loops on as we persist.
On one hand, upon finishing my three-year program, I am leaving the seminary, like the end of a chapter, bidding farewell to my identity as a student and about to start my new chapter as a pastor. On the other hand, studying at the seminary itself has, in fact, already turned over a new leaf for me. Theology has granted me a new perspective to look at the world, the church, and the brothers and sisters in Christ whom I am serving. My journey of asking more questions and seeking more answers is just beginning.
Last but not least, I must give thanks to the loving and faithful Triune God, who has called me to be His servant and let this sinner play a part in His great plans. It is also the Lord who sent me teachers, staff members, fellow students and companions, who were so humble, faithful, and sincere in keeping me company through my ups and downs during the past three years. May the Lord of justice who grants us hope reveal His power and drive the darkness out of the dark age of today, free us from the nets and attacks of the evil one. Let us see the light and not be disheartened, and grant us renewed strength to run the race set out for us.