The Arts of Losing

　　From moving around freely without restraint, we have all been forced to hit the brakes on our pace of life during this epidemic which started during the Lunar New Year: we have lost our customary daily routines; we have lost access to some activity areas; we have lost most of our social lives; we have lost the chance to learn face-to-face in the classroom; and we have even lost the chance to gather at church. Perhaps, we may now learn something from the disabled who often face these kinds of challenges; this I call “the art of losing.”

Still Alice

　　Adapted from a novel, the movie Still Alice premiered in 2014. It is about a university professor, Alice. She has outstanding academic achievements as well as a good marriage and a happy family, but she is then diagnosed with dementia.

　　When the professor is still able to talk, she delivers a speech to a charity supporting dementia patients. In her introduction, she quotes a line in the poem “One Art” written by Elizabeth Bishop (1911-1979): “The art of losing isn’t hard to master.” As a dementia patient, she is forced to struggle with “losing” every day: she makes every effort to keep her precious memories, to stay connected with her favorite things and to retain her own place in the world. She calls upon the audience not to focus on the strange behavior that is part of the disease, and says, “This is not me.” She also asks the audience not to think that she is suffering. “I am not suffering. I am just struggling, struggling to [master the art of losing],” she adds.

　　Alice’s husband is also a scholar. They have three children, two of whom are notable professionals. The youngest daughter, who is an actress, can be counted as the lowest achiever in the family; yet, she is the only one in the family who wants to understand the mother’s struggles and who is interested in the question “Who is Alice?”

　　The movie ends with a dialogue between the mother and this youngest daughter. By then, Alice has lost the abilities of language reception and expression. In the face of her mother, who is seemingly unresponsive, the daughter reads aloud a passage from a play script, to the effect that what people have lost is not really lost, but that it has sublimed to somewhere in the universe. After reading this, the daughter sits next to her mother and asks, “Did you know what it is about?” With the persistent encouragement from the daughter, Alice finally muttered, “Love. Love.” Excitedly, the daughter said, “Yeah, mom. It was about love.”

The Logic of Transformation

　　To further understand the meaning of “mastering the art of losing” mentioned by the main character of the movie, Alice, I recommend making reference to “the logic of transformation” of the human spirit put forward by Dr. James Loder (1931-2001), the late Professor of Philosophy of Christian Education at Princeton Theological Seminary. His interpretation may be helpful to our reflections on our own experiences during this pandemic.

　　In his book The Logic of the Spirit^*, Loder pointed out that the human spirit is like a powerful cannonball. Ever since birth, the human spirit takes the initiative to overcome obstacles in its surroundings and formulate a pattern of wisdom for its interaction with the environment, hence constructing the meaning of its own self and that of the world. In case of confronting any changes that form an obstacle to this interactive pattern, it will make unceasing efforts to find a way out until a new pattern or a new structure of meaning is constructed.

　　Still Alice is a good case in point, illustrating the vitality of the human spirit. The experience of dementia depicted in the movie is not only a nightmare seizing one’s abilities and dignity, but also a struggle for Alice. In Loder’s words, the disease is the change Alice confronts, which forms an obstacle to the regular pattern of interaction between her own self and the world, namely her roles as a university professor, a wife and a mother. When Alice says she desperately wishes to master the art of losing, that is when her human spirit is making an effort to construct a new pattern. For example, she tries to maintain her relationship with her family in various creative ways and even becomes an advocate fighting for the rights of dementia patients. Even at the advanced stage of Alice’s disease, when her condition is nearing isolation from the outside world, her spirit still struggles to overcome the communication barrier by answering her youngest daughter’s question so as to maintain the love between her and her daughter.

The Ultimate Desire

　　Not only does Loder’s logic of transformation give us a better understanding of the vitality of the human spirit, but it also reminds us of the nature of creation and its getting lost. The picture depicting the human spirit’s unceasing pursuits of what it loves is beautiful at times, as in the case of Alice; however, please do not forget that the pursuit can also be ugly as in the example of invading others for one’s allegiance to his/her own clansmen. What Loder excels at here is his provision of a theological interpretation of the transmutability of the human spirit, pointing out that the human spirit is indeed full of power, like a cannonball, which does bear a target. Filled with desires, the human spirit keeps itself on the run in order to seek survival and self-satisfaction. Woefully, even when such desires are fulfilled, the human spirit still feels lost as what it obtains is not truly what it loves. It is easy for the human spirit to misplace love, getting caught in its own trap. The human spirit’s power, its misplacement of love and the feeling of getting lost, Loder explains, reflect that what the human spirit ultimately desires is uncreated. The union with the Divine Spirit is instead the best love of the human spirit which is created. Only by getting united with the Divine Spirit can the human spirit be at rest and find its own meaning and that of life.

　　During the epidemic, we have experienced losses, visible and invisible. We are also struggling to learn “the art of losing.” We have displayed much of the creativity of the human spirit when trying to resume our connections with the world by various means, such as online teaching and online worshipping. Nevertheless, Loder’s theological interpretation of our human spirits does remind us to think about the following questions: Are these what our hearts and souls truly desire? Are we truly content when we obtain them? What is the true goal of “the art of losing”?

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^* James Loder, The Logic of the Spirit: Human Development in Theological Perspective (San Franciso: Jossey-Bass, 1998).